The Myth of Being “Ready”: Why Motivation Is a Poor Long-Term Strategy

On an Olympic track, athletes kneel at their starting positions. Their bodies tense, eyes fixed ahead, listening for the word “ready” and waiting for the sound of the gun. When the signal comes, they explode forward, running with power and precision. It is exhilarating to watch.

But the readiness you see on the track did not begin at the starting line.

It started months, even years earlier.

It began with training in the heat of the sun, in pouring rain, on days when nothing felt inspiring.

It began through pain, fatigue, disappointment, and injury.

It began when no one was watching.

It began when the athlete ran alone, lifted weights in silence, and persisted through routines that seemed meaningless at the time.

Contrary to what we think, readiness is not a state. It is the accumulation of disciplined action over time. It is forged in circumstances that feel inconvenient, uncomfortable, or even pointless. Believing you can wait until you feel ready is believing in a myth. 

Feeling ready is a signal, not a prerequisite and waiting for it is a delay disguised as preparation.

Why the Myth Persists

People cling to readiness because it offers comfort. It tells us we can plan perfectly, know enough, and wait for motivation to appear. It promises that one day, conditions will align and we will naturally take action. That promise rarely materializes. 

Motivation is fleeting. 

Motivation is emotional.

Motivation cannot replace consistency, courage, or practice.

Readiness appeals to perfectionists. 

It appeals to procrastinators. 

It appeals to anyone afraid of failure. 

But the truth is simple: readiness comes from doing, not thinking. It comes from small, persistent steps, often in conditions we cannot control.

Why Motivation Is Overrated

Motivation feels good, but it is unreliable. You will not always feel inspired. Some days your energy will be low. Some mornings you will wake up exhausted or distracted. Waiting for motivation to push you forward is a strategy that fails more often than it succeeds.

Long-term results come from habits, routines, and decisions made regardless of feeling inspired. 

Motivation is a spark. 

Habits are the engine. 

Habits do not rely on feelings.

Habits create results even when enthusiasm fades.

The Practical Reality of Readiness

Readiness is an illusion because it implies a perfect alignment of circumstances, timing, and mental state. These conditions rarely exist. Success does not require feeling ready. It requires acting anyway. Every athlete, entrepreneur, artist, and leader has taken steps they were not ready for. They failed. They learned. They adjusted. They persisted. That is how results happen.

Waiting to feel ready results in delayed action. Delayed action results in missed opportunities. Every day spent waiting is a day lost to fear, overthinking, and indecision.

How to Act Without Feeling Ready

1. Start Small, Start Real

If you want to run, begin with a short route. If you want to write, begin with one paragraph. Small actions compound. They build competence and confidence.

2. Accept Discomfort as a Sign of Progress

Growth is uncomfortable. Waiting to feel comfortable is waiting for stagnation. Discomfort is proof that you are stepping beyond familiar limits.

3. Commit to Routines, Not Inspiration

The long-term engine is consistency. Show up. Repeat actions daily. Track progress. Avoid relying on emotional highs to carry effort.

4. Ignore the Perfect Moment

The perfect moment rarely exists. Resources are never perfect. Circumstances are never ideal. Action in imperfect conditions is the mark of real achievement.

5. Redefine Readiness as Preparation

Readiness should be understood not as waiting, but as preparation. Preparation is doing the work even when you do not feel like it. Preparation builds the skills, habits, and resilience that eventually make decisive moments manageable.

Athletes train when no one is watching. 

Entrepreneurs pitch ideas before they have experience. 

Writers finish books while the world doubts them. 

Leaders make difficult decisions without feeling fully equipped.

Musicians practice scales until their fingers are raw. 

All of them acted before feeling ready. All of them relied on systems, discipline, and repetition instead of waiting for motivation.

Why This Matters for Everyone

Believing in readiness creates procrastination disguised as planning. 

Believing in motivation creates inconsistency disguised as ambition. 

Action, however imperfect, generates feedback, learning, and momentum. 

Action builds confidence. 

Action produces results. 

Waiting for readiness or inspiration produces stagnation and regret.

If you are trying to launch a project, improve a skill, or change a habit, the only reliable path is doing, not waiting. 

Every day you act without feeling ready, you increase the likelihood of success. 

Every day you wait, you lose more than time; you lose confidence in your ability to lead yourself.

Final Thoughts

The athletes kneeling at the starting line did not wait to feel ready. They trained relentlessly, day after day, in conditions that were inconvenient, painful, and imperfect. When the gun fired, they were ready not because they felt ready, but because they had already done the work.

The same principle applies to your goals. Feeling ready is a luxury. Action is a necessity. Motivation will help you sometimes, but discipline and repetition will carry you further. Readiness is a myth. Action is reality. Start where you are, do what you can, and persistence will make you unstoppable.

This Thing Called Self‑Control: Learning to Design Better Yeses by Saying No

We all talk about self‑control like it is some rare skill that only the strong have. We think it means resisting impulses in the moment and holding back until we win. But self‑control is not a heroic act of willpower on demand. It is a  practice of design. It is the choices we make in advance that shape our ability to follow through later.

Systems Over Goals

In Atomic Habits, James Clear  writes that, “You do not rise to the level of your goals. You fall to the level of your systems.” The idea is simple: Goals are the destination. Systems are the path. Without systems, self‑control becomes something we hope for instead of something we build.

The Habit Loop

When we think of self‑control as a momentary battle, we set ourselves up to lose. We think if we just feel stronger today, we will resist that distraction, skip that snack, stay off our phones, or work for longer. But self‑control rarely thrives on feeling. It thrives on structure.

Charles Duhigg in The Power of Habit. He tells us that habits are loops made of a cue, a routine, and a reward. Duhigg explains that when we understand the cues that trigger our behaviors, we can change the routines they lead to. This means self‑control starts not with resisting impulses but with noticing what prompts them in the first place.

Energy, Willpower, and Design

Think about it for a moment.

We usually fail self‑control at night after a long day because our energy reserves are low.

We grab the easiest thing we can find. That is how our brain is wired to conserve effort. If we want to change that, we must change the environment where the choice happens.

We must put the hard decisions earlier in the day when we have more energy. We must remove easy temptations so the default choice becomes the better one.

Another point worth noting comes from Roy F. Baumeister’s research on willpower. Baumeister and John Tierney wrote about willpower in Willpower: Rediscovering the Greatest Human Strength. They show that willpower is not infinite. It gets depleted as the day goes on. This means treating self‑control as something we summon in the moment is not realistic.

Instead we need to design our lives so we are not constantly draining our limited supply. We cannot make every choice a battle. We must arrange our routines so many of those choices are already made in favor of what matters.

The Real Role of Self‑Control

Almost every self‑help book that takes self‑control seriously points to the same truth. The real change happens when we choose the right context. When we remove the easy yes that leads us astray, we make it easier to say yes to what we care about. This is how self‑control stops being a daily struggle and becomes a predictable outcome of good design.

Designing the Path, Not Waiting for Motivation

Stop thinking of self‑control as resisting a pull. Start thinking of it as shaping the path we walk on. That shift is subtle but powerful. When we know what environments and routines help us, we stop relying on inspiration. We stop hoping we will feel strong enough tomorrow. We build conditions that support our goals without requiring daily battles of will.

Here is what that looks like in real life.

If we want to write more, we do not depend on feeling motivated at 10 pm. We set a writing time earlier in the day. We keep our writing space ready. We remove distractions from that space. We do not wait for mood or excitement. We build the context where showing up becomes easier than putting it off.

If we want to eat better, we do not rely on resisting snacks on the spot. We remove tempting foods from the house. We prepare meals in advance. We make the healthy choice the default choice. That way, the moment of decision does not require strength. It simply unfolds naturally.

If we want to be more productive, we stop believing that motivation is the engine. We build routines. We track our progress. We celebrate consistency, not bursts of enthusiasm. We recognize that habits are the engines that make self‑control sustainable.

The Power of Saying No

We also need to face an uncomfortable truth. Saying no is as important as saying yes. A yes to one thing is a no to something else. When we agree to every request, every distraction, every impulse, we dilute our focus. We scatter our energy. We end up exhausted by the end of the day with little to show for it.

We must learn to say no to the immediate pull so we can say yes to the long‑term gain. Saying no to a night of scrolling might mean saying yes to a stronger focus. Saying no to an unhealthy choice might mean saying yes to greater well‑being. Saying no to busyness might mean saying yes to meaningful work.

Self‑Control as Design, Not Struggle

This is a design problem. We are not perfect. We will slip. We will choose the easy yes sometimes. That is expected. The question is whether we build systems that catch us most of the time or whether we leave everything to chance.

The Long Game

When we design better yeses by saying no to the easy distractions, we take control of our days. We choose our habits rather than being chosen by them. We create conditions where self‑control is the default instead of a daily battle.

We do not have to be perfect. We do not have to be strong at every moment. We only need to build better contexts and better routines. When we do that, self‑control becomes less about resisting and more about living in a way that supports our goals.

Self‑control is not a rare gift. 

It is a set of practices. 

It is the result of choices made ahead of time. 

It is the design of our environment and routines. 

It is the better yes that appears when we have said no to the easy distractions.

Final Thought

If we stop thinking of self‑control as a struggle and start thinking of it as design, we change how we live. 

We move from hoping for strength to creating support. 

We build better habits. 

We make better choices. 

And over time, we realize that self‑control was never about resisting. It was about arranging our lives so the right choices become the natural ones.

“Be Careful What You Wish For”: Why the Universe Sometimes Answers Too Literally

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In the movie, Men of Honor, Chief Sunday throws this warning at Carl Brashear:

“Be careful what you wish for; you may get it.”

Many people assume it’s Chinese because it sounds like those ancient, bamboo-scented, fortune cookie proverbs we love to attribute to the East.

But historically, the phrase is not originally Chinese. Scholars trace versions of it to:

  • Greek antiquity (Aesop),
  • English Victorian literature, and later
  • American idioms

So it’s more of a global proverb than a cultural one, yet its wisdom is universal.

This threat-sounding sentence shows us that the danger is not in wishing; the danger is in wishing without understanding the cost.

And what are the costs you may ask?

1. Wishes Don’t Come With User Manuals

Disney may have made the genie nice, but Jinns do not necessarily care about you or your wish but in fulfilling their obligations. They won’t explain the fine print like Aladdin’s genie the same way life doesn’t. Everyone wants “the next level,” but no one asks what comes inside the package.

You want a promotion? Beautiful.

Are you also ready for the accountability, the late nights, the performance metrics, the unspoken expectations, the political pressures?

I remember someone who said, “God, enlarge my coast,” and God really did, but the enlargement also came with staff drama, budgets, and the mysterious ability of generators to break down only during deadlines. The irony is that we often want the blessing without reading the fine print.

2. Some Desires Are Escape Routes Disguised As Dreams

Sometimes what we wish for is not growth but escape. A man says, “I want to marry so I’ll have peace.” He marries and discovers marriage is not a spa but a lifelong team project. All of a sudden the peace he envisioned is nowhere to be found because he had the wrong mindset from the get-go. 

A young person says, “I want to relocate for a better life.” They relocate and meet loneliness they never budgeted for.

The desire wasn’t wrong but the reasoning was shallow. And shallow wishes always come with deep consequences.

3. The Universe Doesn’t Edit Your Request; It Delivers It Raw

Think of it like ordering online.

If you don’t specify, the delivery will not apologise for matching your vague instructions.

You want more followers? You may also receive more scrutiny.

You want a big platform? Prepare for big problems and big temptations.

You want financial breakthrough? Be ready for financial responsibility, which many people secretly fear.

Blessings come as full packages, not curated fragments. 

4. Success Exposes All

In Men of Honor, Brashear’s dream was noble: to be the first Black Master Diver. But the fulfilment of that wish exposed hypocrisy, prejudice, insecurity, and the true character of everyone around him. Your answered prayer might reveal what you’re not ready to see. Success magnifies everything:

Your strengths, your laziness, your impatience, your relationships, your self-control.

Wishing is easy. Carrying the wish when it becomes reality? That’s a whole different ball game. 

5. Before Wishing, Count The Emotionally, Spiritually, and Relationally Cost

Many people only calculate money, but the real cost of desires is paid in:

  • time
  • attention
  • peace
  • relationships
  • discipline
  • identity

Before you wish for a big ministry, a bigger following, a bigger job, or a bigger life, ask yourself: “Do I have the internal infrastructure to hold what I’m asking for?” If not, the problem isn’t the wish but the vessel: you.

6. Every Dream Has Its Shadow

The dream of leadership carries the shadow of loneliness.

The dream of independence carries the shadow of responsibility.

The dream of marriage carries the shadow of selflessness.

The dream of influence carries the shadow of scrutiny.

You cannot wish for the dream and refuse its shadow. 

So, shouldn’t we make wishes?

Of course not. The idea is not to not wish but to wish with understanding and bearing all thought about the consequences and fallout. Wishes in itself are not dangerous. Immature wishes are.

Instead of “I want…”, try:

“I want this with the grace to handle it.”

“I want this with the character required for it.”

“I want this, but I want wisdom first.”

This is how wishes become blessings instead of burdens.

Final Thought

Yes, be careful what you wish for, not because wishing is wrong, but because reality takes wishes seriously.

Dream boldly.

Ask bravely.

But also prepare deeply.

Because the universe, life, and even God have a curious habit of giving us exactly what we asked for and revealing whether we were ready for it.

When Two Elephants Fight: How Not to Be the Grass That Suffers

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We’ve all heard the proverb: “When two elephants fight, it is the grass that suffers.”

It’s poetic, but painfully true. Whether in politics, workplaces, marriages, communities, or even church groups, the real casualties are usually the bystanders, the people with the least power, the workers, the ordinary citizens, and the well-meaning friends.

But what if the “grass” refused to be helpless?

What if, instead of being trampled, the grass learned to reposition, reinforce, or even remove itself before the stampede begins?

But the grass can’t move. Yes, literally, the grass is transfixed and can’t help but be trapped, the idea is to think differently beyond the immovable grass and learn how not to be collateral damage in other people’s battles:

1. Know When The Fight Is Not Yours

It’s not always your business. The first rule of surviving elephant battles is recognising that not every conflict requires your participation.

In many workplaces, team members get dragged into the ego wars of senior leaders. Suddenly, someone is forced to “choose sides.” That’s exactly how grass gets crushed.

What To Do:

Become professionally neutral. 

It is easier said than done when you’re caught between your COO and CEO’s “display of authority” but if you fall into that trap of picking one side, you set yourself up for life.

Why?

The person you went against will have it out for you one way or the other. The person you went with may not even care about you that much and was only in need of a representative office pawn to prove a point. 

You’ll need to learn diplomatic tact. Support policies, not personalities. Let your reputation be built on competence, not alliances.

2. Stay On The Edges, Not The Centre

When big forces are clashing, impact is highest at the centre. In political seasons, for example, citizens get emotionally invested in rivalries that they cannot control. Meanwhile, the actual political actors shake hands after elections and move on, while ordinary people are the ones left with fractured friendships and bitterness.

What To Do:

Maintain emotional distance. The unraveling of hate during political turbulence is a case study of grasses getting between something that was not theirs to get into in the first place. Aspirants plant disturbances in the form of people and soon, friends of 20 years are mad at each other so much so they can’t repair the bond even after all is done.

No one is asking you not to care but you have to care without carrying fire for anyone. Air your views. Defend your opinions. Cast your vote and at the end of the day, no matter how the tides flow, you learn to live in peace.

3. Build An Identity Stronger Than Any System

Grass suffers because it is rooted in one spot. Elephants, on the other hand, roam. If your livelihood, status, or confidence depends on one boss, one political party, one organisation, or one relationship, you have placed yourself directly under the feet of elephants.

What To Do:

Diversify your identity: skills, networks, mentors, and opportunities. Be flexible enough to move. Many people lose promotions because their direct supervisor is clashing with upper management. They themselves are excellent, but their identity is tied to the wrong champion.

4. Learn Early Detection; Elephants Don’t Start Fighting Suddenly

Before elephants clash, the ground already begins to vibrate. In organisations you’ll notice it: at first it could be mild tension between the two heads. Not having the same coffee stand, refusing to attend each other’s stand up, rebuffing ideas flagrantly, closed-down meetings, etc. The actual tussle you witness is the culmination of the tension not the start of it.

What To Do:

Develop political emotional intelligence. Learn to observe power shifts, pay attention to mood, and prepare alternatives before conflict goes public.

This is what agile grass does: it bends before the storm, not during it.

5. Don’t Inherit Other People’s Enemies

One of the quickest ways to become trampled is to inherit the quarrels of people who will forget you tomorrow. Imagine this:

A colleague becomes hostile to you because their friend has an issue with you, an issue you aren’t even aware of. Or in families, siblings inherit grudges their parents had with relatives from 20 years ago.

Does it make sense? There are cases in our personal lives where the enmity is inherited because of the ghastly nature of what was done, but in the professional context, you need to watch how you bear the brunt of what is otherwise none of your business.

What To Do:

Respect everyone. Treat everyone with your own eyes, not someone else’s lens. You owe loyalty, but you don’t owe inherited hostility. If you decide to be hostile, let it be based on your convictions and findings not on hearsay, themsay, shesaid, theythought.

6. Choose Your Elephant Wisely

Sometimes you cannot avoid being connected to someone powerful. If you must align, choose wisely.

Young professionals often attach themselves to charismatic but controversial managers. When the manager eventually gets into trouble, their entire “camp” falls with them.

What To Do:

Align with people of integrity. They may not necessarily be the loudest or most influential, but the fairest.

7. Create Your Own Escape Routes

Grass suffers because it has no exit strategy. People, on the other hand, can create options.

If senior leaders are fighting and your department becomes ground zero, begin preparing: update your CV, strengthen your portfolio, expand your network. This isn’t you being disloyal, it’s having common sense. If the quarrel lightens up and some of you get to stay, that’s great. If you happen to be part of the some, even better. But in worst case scenarios, the last thing you need is to wake up one Monday morning and find yourself jobless because two people just couldn’t get along.

8. Never Let Fear Make You Still

Frozen grass gets crushed first.

Movement is your greatest protection. If politics at work gets hot, become more visible for your competence, not your opinion.

If chaos rises in society, stay informed and proactive.

What To Do:

Learn to adapt. To pivot. To flow with the tide. There are times when staying at a place is the best option and times when it’s not. 

9. Grow Thicker Not Harder

There’s a difference between the two. Growing harder makes you brittle. It means you stop trusting, become cynical, withdraw from people.

Growing thicker means you become emotionally resilient without losing your softness.

What To Do:

Stay compassionate, stay open, but protect your peace. Thick grass bends but doesn’t break.

Elephants Will Stop Fighting, But The Grass Must Live On

Elephants fight, and reconcile tomorrow. But the grass that got crushed doesn’t magically spring back. Your long-term well-being is more important than temporary peacekeeping. Don’t sacrifice your future on the altar of other people’s wars.


Yes, elephants will always fight. Politicians, bosses, family members, influencers, even nations have a propensity together into it at times.

But the grass does not have to be passive. You can be a wise grass: aware, strategic, emotionally intelligent, and mobile.

Because the truth is this:

Survival is not just for the strong. It is for the aware.

How to Read More (and Better) in a Busy, Scattered, ADHD-Driven World

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We live in an age where attention is the new poverty. A world of endless tabs, endless notifications, endless opinions, endless noise. Reading, deep, meaningful, nourishing reading, has become a luxury skill. Not because books are scarce, but because attention is.

Yet reading remains one of the few habits that can expand your mind, deepen your thinking, sharpen your identity, and give you an inner life strong enough to resist the chaos around you.

But most advice on reading is predictable and painfully unhelpful: 

  • set goals
  • schedule time
  • buy books
  • join a book club 

Lovely. But insufficient in a world engineered to splinter your focus. 

To read in today’s society, you need strategies that are rebelliously different. 

And here are some of those strategies to help you read more, and read better, when the world is exhausting your mind.

1. Stop Reading For Quantity; Read For Identity

People try to read more by chasing numbers: 20 books a year, 50 books, 100 books. It backfires, because numbers create anxiety, not depth.

Try this instead:

  • Read as a way to become someone you’re proud of.
  • Identity fuels discipline in a way goals never can.

Say to yourself:

“I am the kind of person who reads.”

2. Have Two Books: One For Your Brain And One For Your Mood

ADHD tendencies make it hard to stick with one book consistently. So work with your psychology, not against it.

Choose:

  • A deep book for when your mind is calm, and
  • An easy book for when your brain is noisy.

Switching strategically keeps you reading, even on days when mental fog tries to sabotage you.

3. Read Before Your Phone Wakes Up

Your phone wakes up earlier than you do, and the moment you touch it, your attention belongs to the world.

Try this

  • Read something before your first digital interaction of the day.
  • Even 2–5 minutes rewires your brain. Consistency beats duration.

Begin your morning with your mind, not the internet. 

But, I have to get ready for work.”

My work is my phone.”

The internet is my work.”

All valid concerns but if you’re serious about rewiring your reading journey, you would spare your mind just five minutes before bouncing into the chaotic digital world.

4. Use The “Two-page Commitment”

The hardest part of reading is starting. Instead of trying to read for 30 minutes, commit to just two pages. Anyone can read two pages and 90% of the time, two pages become 20. This bypasses resistance and gets your brain into motion.

5. Carry A Book As If It Were Part Of Your Outfit

Don’t leave your reading to “when you have time.” Time rarely appears but pockets of time do. Waiting rooms. Queues. Train rides. Bus trips. Lunch break. These are all pockets of time between your daily tasks. If your book is physically with you, these pockets can turn into chapters. 

6. Ruin The Perfectionism That Stops You Reading

Many people don’t read because they think reading must be solemn, organised, or aesthetic. You don’t need the perfect chair, perfect tea, perfect bookmark, perfect silence.

  • Read in chaos.
  • Read in noise.
  • Read in fragments.

Books are not sacred because of the atmosphere but because of the transformation they offer.

7. Let Your Curiosity, Not Guilt, Choose Your Next Book

Don’t read what you think you “should.” Read what pulls your attention with the slightest gravity. Curiosity is nature’s motivator; obligation, its enemy. Follow your curiosity, and reading becomes easier than scrolling.

8. Don’t Finish Every Book; Graduate From Them

  • Some books are meant to be finished.
  • Some are meant to be tasted.
  • Some are meant to give you one brilliant idea and nothing more.

Finishing a bad or unhelpful book may look like discipline to you, but all you did was waste time you don’t even have with a book that you’ll probably never remember and will probably never impact your life. Let go without guilt. A book you don’t finish still made you wiser than a feed you scrolled.

9. Make Reading Your Anti-social Media Ritual

Every time you’re tempted to scroll, pick up your book instead. Over time, your brain starts linking books with comfort and scrolling with noise.

  • Your impulse rewires.
  • Your attention heals.

Reading becomes your refuge, not your homework.

10. Remember: A Reading Mind Is A Liberated Mind

In a world ruled by algorithms, reading is one of the few places your thoughts remain your own. Books stretch your attention span, deepen your empathy, stabilise your emotions, and give you access to people’s entire lifetimes of thinking, all without the chaos of the crowd. To read today is to reclaim yourself.

My Books Are In My Phone

Yes. With many areas lacking access to physical stores, and other personal preference, it is understandable that a majority of your books will be pdf-based or epubs. In cases like this, turn on airplane mode and clear all notifications from the top of your screen. Unless you’re fine deceiving yourself then you must do the hard thing and force your mind to go beyond wanting to scroll every time it sees your phone. 

Reading more is not about discipline but about rebellion. 

  • Rebellion against distraction.
  • Rebellion against mental clutter.
  • Rebellion against living life in fragments.

If you want to read more, don’t force yourself. Craft an inner life so rich that books become your oxygen. In a society drowning in noise, scrolling, and short attention spans, the person who still reads is rare, powerful, and  unstoppable: and that can be you.