10 Outlier Things Future Leaders Should Be Doing Now(For Those Who Know They’ll Lead One Day)

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Everybody talks about “preparing for leadership” as if leadership is a conference you register for two weeks before it starts.

But the truth is simpler and more uncomfortable:

If you will lead tomorrow, it will show in what you are secretly doing today.

Forget the predictable advice: “read more,” “take courses,” “network.”

Those are fine, but they’re mainstream. Leadership has become a buzzword, and buzzwords don’t build people.

Let’s talk about the outlier things, the unexpected disciplines that  build capacity for the kind of leadership that lasts.

1. Learn To Function Without Applause

If you still need compliments to feel competent, you’re not ready for leadership. Because the day you lead, the applause stops and the complaints begin. Train your soul now to work in silence. That’s where real power forms.

2. Practise Making Decisions With Incomplete Information

Most people wait until they “know enough.” Leaders rarely enjoy that luxury. Start making small but real decisions with 70% of the data. It trains your courage, your judgement, and your ability to live with consequences.

3. Build Friendships Across Social Levels Especially “Downwards”

Future leaders are not the ones chasing celebrities but the ones who understand the value of ordinary people: cleaners, technicians, admin, assistants, drivers, interns, etc. These people teach you humility, give you unfiltered intelligence, and later become the backbone of whatever you lead.

4. Learn The Art Of Being Misunderstood Without Becoming Bitter

Future leaders will be misread, misquoted, misjudged. If you take everything personally now, you’ll fall apart later. Train yourself to hold your truth gently without becoming defensive or vengeful.

5. Master Boring Consistency

Leadership is less about charisma and more about reliability. Set one small discipline: sleep, prayer, reading, budgeting, gym, and do it for six months. The goal of consistency is to keep pushing hard even when it’s not fun.

6. Start Treating Relationships As Long-term Investments, Not Quick Returns

A future leader doesn’t use people. They store people gratefully, respectfully, intentionally. Send a message to someone who once helped you.

Check on a former mentor.

Keep relational bridges intact.

Leadership collapses when it is built on transactional networking.

7. Practise Self-control In Small Things

How you handle:

  • your appetite
  • your temper
  • your screen
  • your spending
  • your impulses

is the rehearsal for how you will manage power. If you cannot discipline your cravings, power will simply amplify your chaos.

8. Serve Where Nobody Is Watching

Don’t wait for titles.

Wash dishes.

Stay back to stack chairs.

Offer help without publicity.

Leadership that doesn’t begin in service always ends in tyranny.

9. Study People More Than You Study Textbooks

Emotional intelligence is a crucial survival skill. Watch how people respond under stress. Notice what motivates different personalities. Observe how conflicts escalate or de-escalate. A leader who cannot read people will eventually be ruled by them.

10. Build An Inner Life Deeper Than Your Outer Ambition

Leadership without depth collapses at the slightest pressure.

Invest in silence, reflection, prayer, journaling, self-honesty.

Your mind and spirit must grow faster than your opportunities, or those opportunities will choke you.

Final Thought

If you sense leadership in your future, don’t wait for titles, elections, or invitations. Leadership is not something you step into but something you grow into. Do these 10 outlier things now, and when the time comes, leadership will not feel like a promotion. It will feel like a natural continuation of who you have already become.

How to Build an Inner Life in a Noisy World (For People Who Are Tired Of Living From The Outside In)

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We live in a world that demands noise from us.

Noise in the form of visibility, updates, opinions, busyness, speed, constant engagement, and an endless performance of “I’m doing fine.”

But somewhere between the noise and the expectations, many people have lost the most important space in their lives: the inside.

You can be talented, visible, or even celebrated, yet hollow inside.

You can be busy, productive, and hyper-connected, yet strangely disconnected from yourself.

The world trains us to build the outer life: the CV, the wardrobe, the profile, the visibility, the applause.

But nobody teaches us how to build the inner life, the quiet centre that gives everything else meaning, stability, and direction.

Aristotle would call it the contemplative life.

I simply call it the life that no one can take away from you.

If you’re tired of the constant pull and want something different, here’s how to build it in a noisy, distracted, hyper-stimulated world.

1. Start By Creating A “Quiet Corner” In Your Day

The human soul suffocates without silence. Not necessarily an hour, even ten intentional minutes can change your mental weather.

Sit. Breathe.

No phone.

No music.

No scrolling.

Just you, your thoughts, your God, your inner world.

At first it feels awkward.

Then it becomes peaceful.

Eventually, it becomes necessary.

2. Replace Reaction With Reflection

Most people live in reaction mode:

  • reacting to notifications
  • reacting to news
  • reacting to people’s comments
  • reacting to expectations

Reflection is when you pause long enough to ask:

“What do I really think about this?”

“Why did that hurt me?”

“What is my motive here?”

“Does this align with who I’m trying to become?”

Reflection creates clarity.

Clarity creates peace.

And peace is the fuel of inner strength.

3. Build A Private Relationship With Yourself

Many people know about themselves: their age, their skills, their personality type, but they have no relationship with themselves.

Ask yourself:

  • What do I value deeply?
  • What drains me?
  • What renews me?
  • What do I fear but never admit?
  • What do I want that scares me?
  • What does peace feel like in my body?

The inner life begins with honesty. And honesty begins with self-conversation.

4. Feed Your Mind Something Other Than Noise

Not everything you consume should be fast, loud, or shallow.

Feed your mind with:

  • books that stretch you
  • Scripture or spiritual texts
  • thoughtful podcasts
  • music that calms rather than stimulates
  • silence (yes, silence is food)

You cannot have a deep inner life on a diet of noise and distraction.

5. Develop Rituals, Not Just Habits

Habits are actions.

Rituals are meaningful actions.

Your morning routine can be a habit. But lighting a candle, saying a short prayer, journaling, or stepping outside to watch the sky? That’s a ritual.

Rituals anchor you. 

They slow the pace of a world that moves too fast.

They remind you that life is bigger than emails and deadlines.

6. Protect Your Emotional Boundaries

A noisy world wants access to you, to your attention, your time, your peace, and your energy.

Building an inner life means learning to say:

  • “I’m not available for that right now.”
  • “I won’t engage in that argument.”
  • “I don’t need to respond instantly.”
  • “My peace comes first.”

Boundaries are not walls.

They are filters.

They let in what nourishes you and keep out what destabilises you.

7. Nurture A Spiritual Life In Whatever Way Is Meaningful To You

Whether through prayer, meditation, Mass, Scripture, or  gratitude, a spiritual anchor creates depth.

Without a spiritual life, your inner world becomes a garden without water. A kind of good soil but no nourishment.

With a spiritual life, you develop resilience that is not dependent on circumstances.

8. Build A Small Circle That Speaks Truth Into Your Life

A rich inner life does not mean isolation. It means being intentional about the voices you allow near your heart.

Find people who:

  • challenge you without shaming you
  • correct you without crushing you
  • inspire growth without competition
  • love you without agenda

Inner strength grows best in the presence of healthy relationships.

9. Do Something Slowly And On Purpose

We are losing the ability to slow down.

Do one thing slowly every day:

  • wash dishes slowly
  • walk slowly
  • eat without a screen
  • read a physical book
  • breathe intentionally
  • sit outside and look at nothing

Slowness restores the parts of you that speed has been eroding.

10. Let Your Identity Flow From The Inside Out

This is the core of everything.

When your identity is rooted in:

  • titles
  • roles
  • likes
  • income
  • appearance and
  • achievements,

your peace becomes fragile.

When it is rooted in:

  • self-awareness
  • spiritual groundedness
  • inner clarity
  • values
  • purpose and
  • character,

your life becomes unshakeable.

Your outer world may change.

Your seasons may shift.

People’s opinions may rise and fall.

But your inner life, the space where your real self lives, will remain steady.

Final Thought

The world is noisy.

But you don’t have to be.

You can build a life so grounded, so centred, so inwardly rich that no external chaos can destabilise you. A life no one can give you and no one can take away.

And that, truly, is the beginning of freedom.

The Life That Can Be Taken Away: Rethinking Honour, Validation, and the Pursuit of a Meaningful Life

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Many years ago, when I first met Aristotle in a philosophy class, I didn’t fully appreciate how practical he was. But as life unfolds, his ancient wisdom begins to sound strangely modern, almost as if he had lived among us, scrolling through Instagram, attending performance reviews, and watching political drama unfold in real time.

Aristotle argued that human beings generally spend their lives pursuing one of three kinds of life: 

  • the life of pleasure
  • the life of honour
  • and the contemplative life. 

You might hear this and think, “Philosophy talk,” but if you look closely, you’ll recognise yourself somewhere in that list.

Today, let’s focus on the life of honour because this is the one most people unknowingly chase, and it’s also the one with the biggest built-in danger.

The Life That Depends on Other People

Aristotle said the life of honour is attractive because it feels noble. It is the life of achievement, recognition, influence, and status; what today we might call:

  • career success
  • awards and public praise
  • political visibility
  • professional reputation
  • social media validation

Nothing is wrong with these things. In fact, they are important. Society cannot function without people who lead, excel, and contribute.

But Aristotle pointed out one uncomfortable truth:

Honour is given by others. And whatever is given by others can be taken away by them.

That single insight explains much of the anxiety and performance pressure people live under today.

  • In the workplace, one manager’s opinion can make or break your appraisal.
  • Online, one viral moment can build your platform and one rumour can destroy it.
  • In politics, popularity is a wind that shifts without warning.
  • Even in families, approval can be inconsistent.

A life built on external validation will always feel unstable, because you’re essentially renting your happiness from other people.

And rent can go up.

Or expire.

Or be revoked without notice.

Why This Matters to Ordinary People Like Us

You don’t need to be a politician or a celebrity for this to apply. Think of the everyday situations:

1.Career

You pour yourself into your job, but a change in leadership suddenly reduces your visibility. Or a brilliant project goes unnoticed because someone else takes the credit.

2. Social Media

You start posting your work, expecting encouragement, but the likes don’t come. Or worse, they come and then suddenly they don’t. Your mood rises and falls with metrics you don’t control and your happiness is measured by an algorithm.

3. Family and Society

Some people live as though life is a never-ending audition for respect. They sacrifice peace trying to meet expectations that keep shifting.

In all these cases, you are essentially trusting other people to define your worth.

And people, wonderful as they may be, are unpredictable.

The Alternative: Building a Life That Cannot Be Taken Away

Aristotle believed the highest life is the contemplative life not in the sense of meditating on a mountain, but in the sense of living from the inside out rather than from the outside in.

In practical terms, this means:

Cultivating Inner Competence

Take pride in doing your work well, not because someone will clap, but because you value excellence.

Deepening Your Inner Life

This can mean prayer, reflection, journaling, reading, or simply creating space to think. People with a rich inner world are harder to destabilise.

Knowing Who You Are When No One Is Watching

If applause stopped today, would you still feel grounded? If a role, title, or platform disappeared, would your identity survive? Take time to answer these questions. You’ll be surprised by what you find out about yourself through the answers.

Your Worth Cannot Be Outsourced

The deeper point Aristotle makes is this:

A meaningful life must be rooted in something that cannot be revoked.

When your sense of worth is tied to external validation, your peace becomes fragile.

When it is grounded in personal values, inner clarity, spiritual depth, and sincere self-respect, your life becomes harder to shake.

Titles may change.

Followers may fluctuate.

People’s opinions may drift.

But what is built inside you remains yours.

And that, is the kind of life no one can take away.

“Be Careful What You Wish For”: Why the Universe Sometimes Answers Too Literally

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In the movie, Men of Honor, Chief Sunday throws this warning at Carl Brashear:

“Be careful what you wish for; you may get it.”

Many people assume it’s Chinese because it sounds like those ancient, bamboo-scented, fortune cookie proverbs we love to attribute to the East.

But historically, the phrase is not originally Chinese. Scholars trace versions of it to:

  • Greek antiquity (Aesop),
  • English Victorian literature, and later
  • American idioms

So it’s more of a global proverb than a cultural one, yet its wisdom is universal.

This threat-sounding sentence shows us that the danger is not in wishing; the danger is in wishing without understanding the cost.

And what are the costs you may ask?

1. Wishes Don’t Come With User Manuals

Disney may have made the genie nice, but Jinns do not necessarily care about you or your wish but in fulfilling their obligations. They won’t explain the fine print like Aladdin’s genie the same way life doesn’t. Everyone wants “the next level,” but no one asks what comes inside the package.

You want a promotion? Beautiful.

Are you also ready for the accountability, the late nights, the performance metrics, the unspoken expectations, the political pressures?

I remember someone who said, “God, enlarge my coast,” and God really did, but the enlargement also came with staff drama, budgets, and the mysterious ability of generators to break down only during deadlines. The irony is that we often want the blessing without reading the fine print.

2. Some Desires Are Escape Routes Disguised As Dreams

Sometimes what we wish for is not growth but escape. A man says, “I want to marry so I’ll have peace.” He marries and discovers marriage is not a spa but a lifelong team project. All of a sudden the peace he envisioned is nowhere to be found because he had the wrong mindset from the get-go. 

A young person says, “I want to relocate for a better life.” They relocate and meet loneliness they never budgeted for.

The desire wasn’t wrong but the reasoning was shallow. And shallow wishes always come with deep consequences.

3. The Universe Doesn’t Edit Your Request; It Delivers It Raw

Think of it like ordering online.

If you don’t specify, the delivery will not apologise for matching your vague instructions.

You want more followers? You may also receive more scrutiny.

You want a big platform? Prepare for big problems and big temptations.

You want financial breakthrough? Be ready for financial responsibility, which many people secretly fear.

Blessings come as full packages, not curated fragments. 

4. Success Exposes All

In Men of Honor, Brashear’s dream was noble: to be the first Black Master Diver. But the fulfilment of that wish exposed hypocrisy, prejudice, insecurity, and the true character of everyone around him. Your answered prayer might reveal what you’re not ready to see. Success magnifies everything:

Your strengths, your laziness, your impatience, your relationships, your self-control.

Wishing is easy. Carrying the wish when it becomes reality? That’s a whole different ball game. 

5. Before Wishing, Count The Emotionally, Spiritually, and Relationally Cost

Many people only calculate money, but the real cost of desires is paid in:

  • time
  • attention
  • peace
  • relationships
  • discipline
  • identity

Before you wish for a big ministry, a bigger following, a bigger job, or a bigger life, ask yourself: “Do I have the internal infrastructure to hold what I’m asking for?” If not, the problem isn’t the wish but the vessel: you.

6. Every Dream Has Its Shadow

The dream of leadership carries the shadow of loneliness.

The dream of independence carries the shadow of responsibility.

The dream of marriage carries the shadow of selflessness.

The dream of influence carries the shadow of scrutiny.

You cannot wish for the dream and refuse its shadow. 

So, shouldn’t we make wishes?

Of course not. The idea is not to not wish but to wish with understanding and bearing all thought about the consequences and fallout. Wishes in itself are not dangerous. Immature wishes are.

Instead of “I want…”, try:

“I want this with the grace to handle it.”

“I want this with the character required for it.”

“I want this, but I want wisdom first.”

This is how wishes become blessings instead of burdens.

Final Thought

Yes, be careful what you wish for, not because wishing is wrong, but because reality takes wishes seriously.

Dream boldly.

Ask bravely.

But also prepare deeply.

Because the universe, life, and even God have a curious habit of giving us exactly what we asked for and revealing whether we were ready for it.

Friends in Low Places: The Power of Relationships People Overlook

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There is a line I once heard in an episode of Law & Order that has stayed with me far longer than any dramatic courtroom monologue. A New York attorney was being questioned about how she managed to obtain a sealed piece of evidence, and she simply smiled and said, “I have friends in low places.”

The implication was obvious: someone “below” the glamorous ranks of power, perhaps a clerk, a records officer, a receptionist, a lab technician, had made something possible that no amount of authority, ambition, or high-profile connection could have achieved.

It was a simple line, but the wisdom inside it is remarkably profound. The other version of her reply is “having friends in high places” which is what many of us prefer to have. 

We live in a world obsessed with the upper deck of society. Everyone is networking upward, climbing, reaching, curating relationships that look good on paper. People chase CEOs, senior pastors, influencers, commissioners, directors, “big men,” and anyone with a shiny title. It is almost as if worth is measured by how elevated the people around you appear.

We brag about our social networks and connections forgetting that the word “social” is not limited to a certain class of people.

The world doesn’t run just because of the high places.

It also functions because of the low ones.

Think about it for a minute. If everyone was “big” who would open the doors? Serve as chauffeurs? Cleaners? Aren’t these the low people we tend to overlook and turn down our noses on?

The funny and ironic twist in all of this is that the people in “low places” often have the most direct access, the widest visibility, the deepest loyalty, and an unprecedented power.

The security guard knows who went in and out.

The secretary knows what is really happening behind the doors.

The cleaner hears conversations no one realises they are having loudly.

The driver sees the raw version of the “important” person.

The clerk understands the system far more intimately than the executive.

The technician sees details the manager cannot interpret.

The janitor knows which rooms matter and which rooms are façade.

In a society obsessed with prestige, we forget that proximity is power, and proximity does not always belong to the people at the top.

This is why the most grounded, emotionally intelligent, and truly powerful people treat “low places” with dignity. They understand that it’s not every important person that is noticeable and influence can come in varying forms.

They know that the people the world overlooks are often the ones who hold the keys both literally and metaphorically.

The Truth About Human Value

Our culture mistakenly believes that honour should flow “upward.” It applauds it. Encourages it. Shines a light on those who have magneted the creme de la cremes to their side.

But honour is at its most beautiful when it flows downward; when people treat those with less status as if they carried the same significance.

  • People in low places rarely forget kindness.
  • They rarely forget fairness.
  • They rarely forget the person who looked them in the eye and saw them, not their job title.

High-ranking people may forget you when their priorities change.

But the ones in the “ordinary” roles? They remember who respected them and who didn’t.

And sometimes, when life pivots or doors shift, they become the very hands that lift you higher.

Why Investing in Low Places Matters

They See What Others Miss

Because they are in the background, they hold perspectives that people at the top never access.

They Often Have Authority

They know processes, details, and realities that determine outcomes.

They Are Usually More Authentic

There is less politics, less pretence, and less performance.

They Make Systems Work

Without them, the “important” people collapse. Imagine a secretary being off duty and the “big” man having to run his own schedule, answer his own calls and organise appointments. 

They Inspire Humility

They remind us that human value is not tied to visibility. They represent the kind of power that cannot be faked. The kind that works when titles fail.

The Caveat

The idea of forming bonds with people in low places is not to be mistaken for a networking scheme and backup plan for if the high places turn out as dead ends.

We have to be sincere in our relationships. We have to treat then like any human but that take extra step to be somebody that means well and does well.

Replying to the door man when he tells you to have a nice day and remembering the door man’s name if possible.

Acknowledging that the cleaner is human. They may be there to clean up after you, but deserve to be treated as human beings.

Recognising the worth and work of the secretary as they ensure your work life stays on track.

Sure, they’ve all been hired to work and their work they must fulfil, but having such jobs should not belittle the respect you have for them. If anything, it should make you respect them more.

Relearning What Matters

Chasing people in high places is easy. It appeals to vanity.

But having friends in low places?

That is wisdom.

It is emotional intelligence.

It is the recognition that life moves not only through the hands of the powerful but through the hands of the faithful, the ordinary, the unseen.

Sometimes the cleaner opens a door no politician could.

The clerk gives you information no executive knows exists.

The driver protects you in ways a leader wouldn’t think to.

The cook, the messenger, the receptionist, and the assistants are the ones who change your story without ever stepping onto a stage.

The Beautiful Paradox

The world respects titles.

But life runs through people.

Not big people.

People!

And until we treat every human being, high, low, and in-between, as carriers of dignity and value, we will continue to misunderstand what true influence looks like.

So the next time life surprises you, don’t be shocked if your breakthrough came not from a boardroom, but from a basement.

Sometimes the most important friendships you will ever make are not at the top of the ladder, but on the steps you were too busy climbing.